Did you know that PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) often hits cancer survivors?
"The depth of the traumatic experience of being diagnosed with breast cancer, and going through treatment for the disease cannot be underestimated. This journey is not easy and it changes you... mind, body and spirit. Do not let our smiles fool you. We are bearing scars from this journey. ~Nic McLean"
I was recently looking through CURE magazine and came across a brief article about PTSD in cancer patients and survivors. PTSD, post-traumatic stress disorder, is often diagnosed in soldiers who have gone to combat. According to this article, studies show that up to 35% of us who have completed treatment will deal with PTSD issues too.
*sigh* I've been through some hard stuff y'all. I really have.
What is PTSD? I thought only soldiers in war got that.
As I read the article, I found myself shaking my head in agreement a lot. I recently had a very tough conversation with my boyfriend about my perceived life expectancy. We've been dancing around this conversation a lot. I have a lot of thoughts about it that I just cannot... or rather will not... share with him. But what I have shared with him is that I don't feel like I have a lot of time. Nothing in my medical tests shows that I have anything to worry about. And yet, I feel like I don't have a lot of time left.
Worrying about recurrence is my constant state of mind. I just can't help it. I know the facts about my actual health... I've had some very pointed conversations with my oncologist. I am far more worried than he seems to be. I suppose that's good. I am still worried.
The article mentioned that people who suffer from PTSD often have avoidance issues. They have a fear of future plans and often feel that some things won't happen... I hate to admit it, but I feel that way about a lot of things today.
"Angry, irritable, sleepless cancer survivor? Might be PTSD. [Tweet this]"
The article mentioned that people who suffer from PTSD often have avoidance issues. They have a fear of future plans and often feel that some things won't happen... I hate to admit it, but I feel that way about a lot of things today.
Reading the article made me really think for a long time. I had to really contemplate whether or not to write this post and how transparent I would be about this topic. I opted for the most transparency I could bear.
Behind those smiles and perky attitudes is a lot of pain and a lot of fear
I will admit that most days, I find the perky face of the joyful breast cancer survivor just sickening. Especially when it is my own smiling face and the ever perky... "I'm fine, no worries" response.
Some days that just isn't the truth but how long do you burden other people with that? How much of your pain/fear do you really share?
There are some ways to deal with PTSD in order to manage it and improve your quality of life:
The intensity of PTSD varies from person to person and many people NEVER ever deal with it. Some of us are more susceptible than others to it. But if you recognize yourself in any of these symptoms, please talk to your medical team and discuss your concerns with them. You may not have to take medication to deal with it. There are coping methods that don't involve medicine that can help you to get yourself back to you.
Cure magazine| The War Within (cancer's traumatic impact can have lasting effects)
Picking Up the Pieces: Moving Forward after Surviving Cancer
This book has been a great help to me in navigating the survivor portion of this journey. I do recommend it.
I watched "Return to Amish" the other night and there was a cancer storyline in the episodes I saw. One of the young men (formerly Amish) had fallen in love with an English girl and she found out that her cancer had come back. It was a devastating blow to her, him and his family. I will write a post about my thoughts about that show, but one scene has been bothering me since I saw it.
There was a scene where the young woman with cancer was consoling the sister-in-law of her boyfriend. The formerly Amish young woman was so upset that her friend was going through cancer again. And the cancer patient had to give her a big hug and console her. I watched the show with tears in my eyes and a bit of anger. This isn't politically correct to say but... part of the reason I side eye the perky happy face of cancer survivors is because so often our disease becomes bigger than us. It isn't about us but about the grief that our loved ones have. And we put on the smiles and the perky faces to try to diminish their pain. When the truth is, we're beyond scared shit-less and we don't know how to make you feel any better about our sickness than we do about it. It is our body that is destructing on itself. I can't hug that pain away for you. So we smile to make you feel better. Or we set out to change the world after our treatment because we don't want you to hurt for us. It is all so exhausting. But... you smile and you console and you hug... because they too didn't ask for this intruder and they too are struggling.
Talk to me in the comments. I want to hear your thoughts about this.
I don't share much. I talk to myself a lot though. I need it, to work through my thoughts.
There are some ways to deal with PTSD in order to manage it and improve your quality of life:
- psychotherapy (also known as talk therapy) - focus on talking through your concerns with a mental health professional and adapting coping skills to help you put things back in balance.
- support groups - similar to psychotherapy but in a group setting. Sometimes with a qualified mental health professional, sometimes with a group leader who is trained to lead the group.
- cognitive-behavioral therapy - learning to change your behaviors by changing your thinking patterns
- anti-depressant/anxiety medication - you will need to discuss this with your medical team to determine which medication is best for you.
Links for more information:
Cure magazine| The War Within (cancer's traumatic impact can have lasting effects)
Picking Up the Pieces: Moving Forward after Surviving Cancer
This book has been a great help to me in navigating the survivor portion of this journey. I do recommend it.
*Random after thought*
I watched "Return to Amish" the other night and there was a cancer storyline in the episodes I saw. One of the young men (formerly Amish) had fallen in love with an English girl and she found out that her cancer had come back. It was a devastating blow to her, him and his family. I will write a post about my thoughts about that show, but one scene has been bothering me since I saw it.
There was a scene where the young woman with cancer was consoling the sister-in-law of her boyfriend. The formerly Amish young woman was so upset that her friend was going through cancer again. And the cancer patient had to give her a big hug and console her. I watched the show with tears in my eyes and a bit of anger. This isn't politically correct to say but... part of the reason I side eye the perky happy face of cancer survivors is because so often our disease becomes bigger than us. It isn't about us but about the grief that our loved ones have. And we put on the smiles and the perky faces to try to diminish their pain. When the truth is, we're beyond scared shit-less and we don't know how to make you feel any better about our sickness than we do about it. It is our body that is destructing on itself. I can't hug that pain away for you. So we smile to make you feel better. Or we set out to change the world after our treatment because we don't want you to hurt for us. It is all so exhausting. But... you smile and you console and you hug... because they too didn't ask for this intruder and they too are struggling.
Talk to me in the comments. I want to hear your thoughts about this.
