Dating chronicles: It is not getting better on the dating scene


Happy Valentine's Day!! Okay... so what that its just a few days past Independence Day (July 4th) and I'm a bit out of order to be thinking about Valentine's day... Bear with me for a second.  I came across an article today about how to get through Valentine's Day when you're single (and don't want to be). I know you're wondering who thinks about V-day in July? That would be me...

The article was nice, a little cheesy I suppose but then Valentine's Day is cheesy. And honestly speaking, the cheese factor is what makes that day and that time of year so extra exciting for me. Reading that article today though made me sniggle at myself because lately I've been on a roll of pretty pitiful dates.

Let's start with the guy that I've known for years.  We've actually gone out a few times on some pretty cool platonic dates. I wouldn't exactly call us close friends but we're more than acquaintances -- I mean, we've known each other for quite a few years. It is wearing me out that this friend will get one date right and we will have a fantastic time... and then every other date wrong. And by wrong I mean, stuff like... he'll ask me out on a date and then have no idea what he wants to do, where he wants to go or even if he's got the time. But he wants to go out. And he thinks he wants to go out with me. But he's not sure. So while he's making up his mind... he wants me to be on hold until he makes a decision. Or not. Or, he'll ask me my availability for a date and then when I say that I am available, he'll say... oh cool. Let's get together. And then I won't talk to him again for a month or so. (gas face) Or, he'll ask me on a date, actually have concrete plans to do something specific... and then he will stand me up. Sometimes he'll say he fell asleep. Other times, he got sick. And so on. Repeatedly. The excuses are always different but the end result is the same. I was asked on a date. And then the date falls through at the last minute.

(nervous laugh)  That's pretty normal, right? Everybody accepts dates with people who have known them for years but who then end up standing them up?  Isn't it common for someone you're not dating to pick a fight with you at very inopportune times.  Even after you remind them that you're not a couple AND the last few times that you were supposed to get together, he was the one who had a problem making it happen? Fights that make little sense considering that we aren't even dating... (you have to actually go ON the date in order to consider yourself, ya know... dating)

That doesn't happen solely to the smiley-faced breast cancer girl? Right? No? Sigh. Dang. Being stood up is one of the most pathetic feelings in the world. However, I recently had the joy of experiencing the absolutely most miserable feeling in the world (on a date) and that is...


Being left at a gas station late at night, at the end of the date. 

Sigh... I'm too embarrassed to even share the details of that fiasco. Long story short, I went to get a slurpee at the 7-11 next door, and he thought I teleported home... So, he took off. In the middle of the night. Leaving me stranded at a suburban gas station. And my cellphone was dead. And my charger was at home. So, I couldn't call him and scream at him to come back for me. And of course in this age of smartphones, I did not have his number memorized at all. Basically, I was short. Luckily, the clerks at the store took pity on me and called me a cab. But sheesh... how many other breast cancer survivor babes do YOU know who get treated so well by guys who dig her? (laughs)

There has to be an award for this sort of foolishness. Only Nicole has experiences like this. And only Nicole is still so giddy about love that she can read an article about how to maneuver through another "I'm still single" Valentine's Day in the middle of July... and smile. Despite her current track record of bad dates.

The guys aren't bad guys. Not at all. I just don't think that its been a good connection.  In all truth, maybe its me. Its highly possible that I'm just not a fun date these days. I have a lot on my mind and quite possibly, the thought of spending hours of time with me just might be more than some folks can bare. (laughs)  I really don't know.  I would say that I'm going to keep trying, keep accepting dates. But I know that's not the truth. Half of the year is gone and as you've seen, I haven't been doing so well when it comes to dating. So, I think that taking a mental time-out and focusing on other things might be the best course of action. Because if the next dude leaves me stranded, or falls asleep and forgets that he asked me out on a date... I just might get a little Lorena Bobbitt-ish on folks.

And that's not cool. (laughs) At least at this point... I'm not getting hit on by other people's husbands. And that is something to be excited about. Baby steps.

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