my momma...

I had not intended to write a post about my mother tonight... but I feel compelled right now. I just found a bunch of poems, essays and other writings that I thought were forever lost on the internet. I've been sitting in the same place for hours, just reading my old writings, trying to remember my emotional state at the time and re-reading the responses that I kept to those writings. Its been a great trip down memory lane. (I used to be a pretty good poet...lol)

Anywhooo... I came across a poem I wrote to my mother a few years ago.

I used to belong to an on-line poetry group called the PoetsNiche. It was an amazing experience for me. In that group, we would share work that we had written to get feedback and critiques from other poets in the group. In the preface to the poem I wrote for my mom, I wrote that I was inspired to memorialize what she meant to me because of a breast cancer scare. (freaky, right?)

Reading that poem tonight really brought tears to my eyes. I remember when she told me that she had to have a biopsy on a small lump that she found in her breast. I was sooo scared. I mean totally freaked out. Of course reading that poem tonight brought me full circle emotionally. I still feel the same way -- my momma is the bomb! But even more so because she is so faithful in her love for me, her willingness to do for me, to help me. Before this post gets too long, too mushy... I'll just share the poem with you guys.

I'm sure that many of you love your mommas like I love mine... I just had to share this love tonight. It has increased 10-fold since I wrote this.

Enjoy!

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A letter to my momma

The memories of us
Laughing and crying
Talking and cooking
Listening and loving
Even fussing and fighting
Drive me to excel

You`ve always been there
When I needed you
And even when I thought I was grown

You were my first teacher
My first disciplinarian

You carried me...
Those times I didn`t know
How to carry myself

By watching you I learned
That sexy isn`t slutty
That parents can be friends
That love requires work
And that family means everything

You taught me
To keep my head high
To walk with elegance
And not be ashamed of my gifts
Or my beauty

You let me
make my own decisions
So many times that
I thought everyone would give me that option
Now I know I have to earn respect from the world
Just as I earned it from you

Because of your love
I found God for myself
And you accepted my choice
As my own
No questions

Your food fed my body
Your love fed my soul
Your trust fed my spirit
Your abilities made me whole

I know that our forever together
Will someday come to a close
But I need to let you know
That I thank God for you
And I thank you for me

I love you mommy...
...signed Nikki
Your favorite friend
And only daughter

) Nicole McLean2001

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